Chainsaw
by tightrope-inthe-closet
Summary: Beca's sanity is hanging by a thread, along with her heart. Something has to break before she can let her family in. Just what will it take for Aubrey to find a way through the walls of the once again distant brunette.


Beca heard her phone ringing as soon as it started. She was currently in the garage working on the truck, while Aubrey and the kids had gone to Aubrey's sister's house. She quickly wiped the grease off her hands, and rushed to answer before it stopped ringing.

"Hello?"

"Becs," Beca heard the voice of her own older sister filter through the line. The first thing she noticed was the hint of sadness in her voice.

"Ansley? What? What's wrong? Where are you?" Beca asked in a rush.

"At the hospital. Beca, it's mom. It's so much worse."

The news sent Beca sliding down the wall of the garage. Her head cradled in her hands. Ansley's voice could barely be heard calling out for her through the phone lying on the cement beside her.

At the sound of the car pulling into the driveway, Beca stood from her crouched position. Sometime within the last three hours of sitting on the garage floor, she had reverted back to her stubborn and closed off self. She pushed all her emotions down and plastered on the most genuine seeming smile she could manage.

As Aubrey and their four kids came into the garage, not one of them noticed anything was wrong. Beca had too much practice at hiding her emotions.

"Hey, babe. Did you get the truck fixed?" Aubrey said, as she walked towards Beca with 10 month old Thomas in her arms and 2 year old Ava following behind while clinging onto her belt loop.

"No, not yet." Beca was still a bit too distracted to notice Aubrey lean in for a kiss and didn't even register that she had basically dodged the blonde's lips when she turned back to the toolbox.

"Is everything okay?" Aubrey asked, feeling slightly hurt by the rejection.

"Yeah. Of course. Why wouldn't it be?" Beca replied, becoming slightly defensive for no obvious reason.

"Well, okay then. I'm gonna go put Thomas down for his nap. Come on Ava, you could use a nap too. Grace, could you come help me start dinner, please?" Aubrey called over her shoulder as she led the smallest two children into the house.

"Coming, mama," thirteen year old Grace said as she followed.

"Hey, mom, can I help with the truck?" ten year Wyatt asked.

"Yeah, sure. Just don't mess with anything you're not supposed too," Beca replied.

As Beca worked under the hood, trying to replace the radiator, Wyatt wandered around the garage, aimlessly brushing a hand against a row of cups lined up on top of the workbench.

He didn't have time to catch the falling cups before they hit the floor, spilling their vast collections of sorted screws everywhere. Beca tensed her jaw in annoyance. "Didn't I tell you not to touch anything?" Beca asked, not noticing that she had raised her voice.

"I'm sorry, mom." Wyatt said as he crouched to begin picking the mess up.

"Just leave it," Beca snapped as she noticed the boy was just grabbing handfuls and throwing all the screws into the same cup.

At this point Aubrey opened the door and stepped into the garage. "Hey, what's going on out here?"

She was barely able to finish asking the question before Wyatt stormed past her, angry tears filling his eyes. She turned to her wife. "Don't you think you overreacted just a little bit?"

"Don't you think a ten year old would be able to follow simple directions," Beca responded.

Aubrey raised an eyebrow in question of her wife's attitude. "Okay, what is wrong with you?"

"Just leave it alone, Aubrey," Beca spoke through gritted teeth.

The blonde sighed in frustration before turning around and going into the house, wondering what had happened while she'd been gone.

Life went on for the next week although it was anything but usual.

The family went about their days, going to school and work like nothing was wrong. Aubrey pretended everything was fine for the sake of the kids. She was painfully unaware that the older kids had caught on to her act. Grace and Wyatt had both noticed Beca had pulled away from her family. The only time they ever saw her in the past week had been in the mornings when she came into the kitchen while they were eating breakfast, and only long enough for her to grab coffee before rushing out the door to work.

Beca considered it easier to avoid her family than to have them ask her why she was upset. She consistently chose to stay at the studio late before heading to a local bar just so she wouldn't have to face the reality of what was happening and the affect her cowardly actions were having on her family.

Aubrey was desperate to know what was going on. On the few occasions she and Beca had actually seen each other in the light of day over the past week, their tempers had flared. Aubrey's brought on by her wife's complete dismissal of her family. Beca's brought on by self hatred for what she was doing and what she had no control over.

The blonde just could not understand what was going on with her wife.

By Saturday, the tension had thickened to the point of needing a chainsaw to cut it.

As the 'happy' family arrived at Aubrey's parent's house for their monthly family BBQ, Grace and Wyatt rushed out of the car, glad to be able to escape the tense silence. The parents both stepped out and retrieved the younger children. They walked around to the back porch where Aubrey's parents and sister all sat around a picnic table. Aubrey managed to force a smile onto her face while Beca couldn't find it in her to even try and fake it. Beca put Ava down and watched as she ran to her grandfather and hugged him, doing the same with her grandmother before running off to chase after the older kids.

Upon seeing Thomas, Aubrey's mother, Elaine, automatically took him from her daughter's arms, cuddling the smiling infant against her.

"Hey, girls. Grab a seat. Dinner is almost ready. Beer, anyone?" Aubrey's father, Bill, asked as he went in to grab himself one.

"Yeah. I'll take one," Beca called after him.

"Of course you will," Aubrey muttered under her breath as she took a seat next to her sister at the picnic table. Catherine raised an eyebrow at her sister. When Aubrey saw the questioning gesture she shook her head telling her not to ask. Beca sat down next to Aubrey on the bench, however the distance she left between them didn't go unnoticed by anyone. As Bill returned with the opened beers, setting one down in front of Beca, he too noticed the unusual distance.

Deciding to stay out of his daughter's business, he tried to start a conversation.

"So, Beca, how's work going?"

"Well right now…" Beca started.

"Well it must be going pretty good considering you're always there." Aubrey muttered angrily.

Beca turned to her wife. "Seriously? Do we have to do this now?"

"You know what, yes. Yes we do. Because every other time I see you, you're drunk off your ass."

Beca scoffed before getting up off the bench and heading down the porch steps to try and gain some distance so she wouldn't lose her temper. Aubrey however got up and followed her. Aubrey's family stood in shock on the porch, unable to do anything but stand and watch the scene unfold. Luckily the kids had gone in to play video games and were not witnessing the screaming match.

"What is going on with you lately?! You're being an ass."

Beca just remained silent as she paced in front of Aubrey.

"You stay out late and when you do finally come home, you're so fucking drunk you can barely stand up. I just don't get it. What?! Are you cheating on me?! Do you want a divorce?!" The last parts came out tinted with sadness.

At this Beca's head shot up. "No! God no!" She cried with a tone of desperation and a few tears falling.

"Then what is it? Talk to me." Aubrey's own tears were falling by this point.

And finally, the tension broke. The chainsaw had finally found its mark.

"My mom has cancer." Beca let out in a painful exhale. The news had shocked Aubrey into speechlessness. "She went to the doctor last week and they found a tumor on her brain. There's nothing they can do. She only has a few months."

Beca let her voice trail off and stood staring at the ground for a moment, tears dripping off her face before falling to her knees in the grass, sobs wracking her frame.

As soon as Aubrey saw Beca begin sinking to the ground, she rushed to kneel next to her, pulling her into her arms. "Oh my god," she breathed.

The adults on the porch stood in different states of shock. Elaine was the first to snap out of it. "Aubrey," she called to her daughter, "take your wife home. We have the kids, she needs you." She gave a sympathetic smile before ushering the others into the house.

Aubrey pulled Beca to her feet. "Come on, baby. Let's go home," she began leading the still sobbing brunette to the car.

Upon arriving at their house, she led the brunette to their bed and laid down, pulling the smaller woman into her arms. "Why didn't you say anything?"

"I thought if I just didn't think about it, it wouldn't hurt as much," Beca scoffed at herself.

"Have you been to see her?"

At this Beca sobbed brokenly, "I can't. I can't see her like that."

Aubrey tightened her arms around the woman. "Becs, I think you should go. I don't want you to regret not seeing her. I'm not trying to make you feel guilty and if you really can't handle it, that's okay. I'm not going to force you to go. But if you do decide that you want to see her, I will be right there with you. I will always be right there with you, for whatever."

Beca nodded into Aubrey's neck. "I know. Right now, I just need you to hold me."

Aubrey pressed a kiss to the side of Beca's head and they settled in for a long night of comfort and healing.


End file.
